Insanity Abound
by Ryoko-Pegasus
Summary: What happens when the YGO gang is transported to the Virginia countryside where a hyper fox girl, her psycho yami, and other oddities reside? Shovels and craziness! (Language and crude humor)
1. TGIF

DISCLAIMER: I do not own "Yu-Gi-Oh!" or "Dragonball Z" (though I wish that I did). Kitt, Kat, Risika, Tengu, Tigra, and Koneko belong to AnimeKat 2002. Prue, Nikkia, Aerro, and Mackenzie belong to Prudence. However, I do own Ryoko, Hoofamon, Kenyamon, Shinmon, Plague, Zoe, Wolf, Merlin, Muff, and Sin.

T.G.I.F.

The blonde haired girl hopped off of the school bus, fox tail wagging and sky blue eyes shining in the afternoon sun. Her fluffy golden fox tail was tipped in white and so were her overly huge fennec fox ears. Under each of her eyes on her cheeks was a purple Z-shaped marking. Her blonde hair, which was put up high in a rainbow ponytail holder, had white tips and she was wearing a pair of faded blue jeans and a yellow "Dragonball Z" T-shirt with the Capsule Corporation logo on the front and a picture of Trunks on the back. She was wearing two belts, a watch, a charm bracelet, white and blue tennis shoes, sky blue ball shaped earrings, black half-fingered gloves, and a gold Egyptian ankh necklace. She was 5' 1 ½'' tall.

"Hurry up, y'all! Let's get our homework done!" The seventeen year-old shouted happily as she crossed the small country street and checked the mail. A 6' 2'' eighteen year-old boy with long blue hair, blue eyes, large muscles, black boots, baggy pants, and a tight muscle shirt that showed off his eight pack followed her with his hands crossed behind his head.

"Man, do we _HAVE_ to, Ryoko?" He asked her.

"Hoofamon, I only have a few geometry problems to do. No sweat. I'll be done in less than fifteen minutes," Ryoko replied as she flipped through the mail and began walking up the long gravel driveway. Hoofamon shuddered at the mentioning of his least favorite school subject.

"She complicated circles... HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO COMPLICATE CIRCLES?!" He demanded, kicking the gravel as he shuffled along behind Ryoko. "Stupid Mrs. Wallace..."

"Apparently radii and diameters have measurements that all lead up to the circumference," quipped another blonde girl. This girl was taller than Ryoko by 2 and ½ inches. Unlike Ryoko, this girl was a bit more buxom, but still quite small around the waist. Her eyes were the same as Ryoko's and her hair was down and looked similar to the Dark Magician Girl's. She appeared to be the same age as Ryoko. She was dressed in a white T-shirt with the words "Foxxy" printed across it in lavender, khaki shorts, purple and white tennis shoes, silver half-fingered gloves, and a silver Egyptian ankh choker.

"Shut up, Kenyamon! I'm scarred enough as it is that we've got homework on a Friday!" Hoofamon argued.

"If only you would pay attention in class instead of sleeping, then maybe you would not be so confused," said a second eighteen year-old boy. He was an inch shorter than Hoofamon, but just as well muscled. His white hair was short, shaggy, and spiky and sharply contrasted with his deep black eyes. He wore a beanie on his head to hide his pierced cat ears and a large jacket tied around his waist to hide his fluffy cat tail. Because he had the legs of a cat, his feet were covered with black socks. He seemed to have an ancient, mystical aura about him. He was dressed in baggy blue jeans and a white T-shirt. In a flash, Hoofamon had him in a headlock.

"You can keep your mouth shut for all I care, Shinmon," Hoofamon threatened as he gave his friend a power noogie. Tears were in Shinmon's eyes as he struggled to get free.

"I apologize!" Shinmon said.

"Not good enough, you have to say uncle!" Hoofamon replied.

"Uncle, UNCLE!!!" Shinmon cried. Hoofamon released him, dusting his black bowling gloves on his shirt.

"That's what I thought, you mangy cat."

"JABBERWOKIE!!!" Cried Kenyamon as she tackled Hoofamon to the ground. Shinmon sweatdropped as Hoofamon attempted to push his hyper half-sister off of him.

"That is the last time that I allow her to eat Skittles after eating the cafeteria's brownies," Shinmon said nervously.

"ASSHOLE!!!"

"BITCH!!!"

"BASTARD!!!"

"DUMBASS!!!" Everyone turned as Sin and Plague walked down the driveway, arguing and shouting insults in each other's faces. They never got along. Hoofamon leaned against the fence rail, one eye on the two foul-mouthed teens and the other closed, his arms crossed behind his head.

"Are they arguing over the fact that Plague mixed nitro in a Coke bottle and threw it at him?" He asked lazily.

"Either that or because Sin slammed Plague's head into every single locker door they passed today going to English after lunch," added Kenyamon. Ryoko twitched her tail.

"Guys, please stop fighting," she begged.

"ASS MAGGOT!!!" Shouted Plague.

"I'd rather be an ass maggot than a maggot's ass," the Goth samurai answered coolly. Hoofamon sweatdropped.

"They invent new words," he said.

"Will this turn into World War III?" Asked Shinmon.

"Nah, we've already had that. I think this will be World War XXXXIII," replied Kenyamon.

"I'll take away your pickles," Ryoko warned. Plague rounded on her hikari.

"Are you threatening me?" She asked.

"No, it's a promise, yami," Ryoko replied. Plague glowered. She hated it when Ryoko threatened to take her pickles away. Plague was 5' 9'' and had spiky aqua green hair tied back in a blue ribbon with rainbow beads. The seventeen year-old's bangs spiked out everywhere and her eyes were red. She had black markings on the corners of her eyes that curved under them like Malik Ishtar's. Black tattoos were on her torso and arms and her nails were painted black. She had a brown belt, black hose, black knee-high boots with buckles, and blue jean shorts that had two purple tails sewn onto the back pockets with a strange black symbol bedecked on the ends. A red strapless bikini style top revealed her tattoos, the so-called "shirt" trimmed in yellow and a chain hanging down in the front. She wore a long, red, sleeveless jacket and red arm warmers with black half-fingered gloves. Skinny black belts with silver studs wrapped around both of her arms. Like Ryoko, she had fox ears and a tail, only hers were different. Her tail was silver with a white tip and had a crest of white hair going down the center. Her ears were colored the same with white tufts of hair inside of her ears and on the tips. Blue wave crest patterns decorated the outside of her ears and she had four piercings in each.

"Now, what was your cussing fit over?" Ryoko asked.

"He cheated in a game of Duel Monsters," Plague accused. Sin grunted.

"Only the weak minded accuse others of cheatery when they themselves were the ones who did the cheating," Sin said.

"Screw you!" Plague growled. Kenyamon counted off on her fingers.

"He said eighteen words! That's a record!" She squealed.

"Sin won, then?" Shinmon asked.

"He _THINKS_ that he won because the dumb bastard cheated," Plague seethed.

"If I'm dumb, then how could I have won?" Sin asked. Plague fumed and pulled out her grenade launcher, the "K12 Asskicker."

"GOTH ASSHOLE!!!" She spat. Sin smirked cockily.

"Damn straight I am," he said. Ryoko grabbed Plague's weapon.

"Plague, be nice! Fighting won't solve anything," Ryoko scolded. Plague pouted as Sin grunted smugly. He was 6' 5'' and his well-toned body's muscles were slightly larger than that of Shinmon's and Hoofamon's. His ice blue eyes were cold and his long, black, silky hair reached the back of his knees. A scar ran diagonally from under his right eye to his forehead. The mysterious and handsome nineteen year-old Gothic samurai was dressed in chains, belts, leather pants, and a tight leather shirt much like Hoofamon's with a red cross and buckles decorating the front of it. His ears had countless piercings and his left forearm and hand were wrapped black gauze. He carried a black jagged-edged katana with him. Not much was known about his past. In fact, nothing was known about him other than the fact that he was a ronin.

"Can I have my weapon back, now?" Plague asked. Ryoko shook her head.

"Ask nicely," she replied.

"Gimme my damn weapon!" Plague demanded. Ryoko shot her an intense stare, causing Plague's eye to twitch. "Can I _PLEASE_ have my weapon?" She asked. Ryoko smiled.

"That's better. As long as you don't use it," she said, handing the grenade launcher back to Plague.

"That was a fatal mistake," Kenyamon observed. Ryoko shifted through the mail once more and squealed in delight, causing Hoofamon to jump.

"What the heck?!" Hoofamon shouted. Ryoko held up part of the mail.

"I got my new horse magazine!" She chimed. Everyone facefell. "Now come on, I've got homework and 'Yu-Gi-Oh!' is coming on! T.G.I.F. indeed!"

Yugi Mutou was walking down the street towards his grandfather's game shop. The sky was a brilliant blue and he was musing over what a peaceful day it was when his thoughts were interrupted.

"Hey, Yug!" Yugi, startled, turned around and smiled as Joey ran up to him.

"What's up, Joey?" He asked.

"Tristan wanted me to tell you that the gang's gonna be meetin' at Burger World here in about an hour. Wanna come?" Asked Joey. Yugi's face lit up.

"Sure! Who all's gonna be there?" He asked. Joey counted off on his fingers.

"Lessee here... Me, Tristan, Téa, Mai, Duke, Serenity, Bakura, and Malik," he stated.

"Sounds great! I'll be there!" Yugi answered. Joey grinned.

"Great! See ya around!" He said before running off.

"Bye, Joey!" Yugi shouted, waving after his friend. Yugi ran into the game shop. "Hi, Grandpa!" He greeted. Solomon Mutou looked up from the newspaper that he had been reading.

"Hi, Yugi. Good day?" He asked as Yugi opened the door to the back part of the store that served as their living quarters.

"Yeah, but I'm sure glad that it's Friday," he said cheerfully.

"I agree. It's been a long week," Solomon replied. "Do you have any homework?" He asked.

"I just have to read a few pages in my biology book, that's all," Yugi stated. "Everyone's gonna meet at Burger World in about an hour to hang out, so I was planning on going after I read." Solomon smiled.

"That's fine," he said.

"I'll be in my room if you need me," Yugi said as he went up to his room. He closed his door and threw his book bag onto his bed and took out his biology book. As he sat down at his desk and opened the book to the page that he was supposed to start reading, Yami Yugi appeared.

"How many pages must you read?" He asked as he sat down on the bed.

"Only ten," Yugi replied, his eyes moving up and down as he read the Japanese text. Yami cocked an eyebrow.

"Is that all?" The Egyptian spirit asked.

"I'm a fast reader, so it'll be no problem for me," Yugi answered as he turned the page.

"What's the occasion for the get together?" Yami asked.

"I guess it's to celebrate the start of the weekend, as usual," Yugi answered, glancing over at his yami. Yami Yugi nodded ever so slightly and his purple gaze studied the Millennium Puzzle around his neck. He was silent until Yugi finished reading. The Domino High student closed his book and stood up. He looked at the clock. It was 5:20. It had only taken him eight minutes to read. It would take him twenty minutes to get to Burger World. He decided that he would leave in ten minutes in order to get there early. Yami looked up as Yugi crossed the room and picked up his dueling deck and shuffled through it.

"What's on your mind?" Yami asked.

"Ever since Battle City, things have changed," said Yugi. He stopped shuffling and stared at the Red Eyes Black Dragon card that Joey had given him. "Remember when Malik took control of Joey's mind?" He asked. Yami nodded. "My friends stood by me. You were always there to help me out, Yami. I'll never forget everything that you've done for me. You're a great friend," he said with a smile. Yami smiled back.

"The love of our friends is stronger than anything," Yami stated. Yugi nodded and pocketed his deck.

"Battle City was over four months ago. Malik, Isis, and Rashid went back to Egypt for a while---and then they decided to move here into that big apartment complex down the street," Yugi explained. "Since then, we've become great friends. I've forgiven him for all of the things that he's done. What about you?" Yami thought for a moment before answering.

"I had a harder time, but I forgave him," he replied. Yugi glanced at the clock. It was now 5:30. He grabbed his jacket.

"Well, looks like it's time to go," observed Yugi. His yami nodded and rejoined Yugi's body. Turning off the bedroom light, Yugi headed down the stairs. "I'll be back at around 8:30, Grandpa!" He called as he opened the door.

"Alright, be safe and have a good time!" Solomon shouted. Yugi waved.

"I will!" Yugi said as the door closed behind him. He walked down the street and soon broke into a run. He was so excited! He could not wait to hang out with his friends!


	2. The Book

DISCLAIMER: I do not own "Yu-Gi-Oh!" or "Dragonball Z" (though I wish that I did). Kitt, Kat, Risika, Tengu, Tigra, and Koneko belong to AnimeKat 2002. Prue, Nikkia, Aerro, and Mackenzie belong to Prudence. However, I do own Ryoko, Hoofamon, Kenyamon, Shinmon, Plague, Zoe, Wolf, Merlin, Muff, and Sin.

The Book

"NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Ryoko giggled insanely. Everyone sweatdropped as she began drooling all over the floor. After her homework was finished, they had all sat down to watch "Yu-Gi-Oh!" It was the end of Battle City, episode 142---and Malik had taken his shirt off.

"Down, Ryoko! Down! Control those hormones!" Plague scolded as she repeatedly hit her over the head with a pillow. Ryoko squealed as she stared at his abs. The camera shifted to his back.

"I LOVE THAT VIEW!!!" She screamed. Hoofamon sighed. She was completely obsessed with Malik. The camera shifted to Isis. "Hey, wait, WAIT!!! GO BACK!!!" The camera went back to Malik, but only showed his face. "GO DOWN!!! GO DOWN!!!" She demanded, throwing a few packs of tartar sauce at the screen. A few more shots later, it showed more of Malik's chest. Ryoko fell onto her back, twitching with muscle spasms.

"Piss! I think she's having a damn stroke!" Plague swore.

"THIS IS THE HAPPIEST SEIZURE OF MY LIFE!!!" Ryoko cried. Hoofamon smiled slyly.

"It's showing his stomach again," he stated.

"WHAT?!" Ryoko sat up and slammed Hoofamon's face into the carpet as she sat on top of him and pressed her eyeballs against the TV. She growled.

"Dog gammit, Hoofamon, don't get my hopes up like that!" She whined as Seto Kaiba appeared on the screen.

"NEED AIR!!!" Shouted Hoofamon's muffled voice. Ryoko got off of him and Plague slapped him upside the head.

"Dumbass," she snorted.

"Forget Malik, where's Bakura-sama? Why don't they have _HIM_ shirtless?" Kenyamon asked.

"Yami Bakura has been shirtless before," stated Shinmon.

"But I don't like his yami. I like sweet, little, Bakura Ryou," Kenyamon squeaked.

"Seto needs a girlfriend. That guy's depressed," Plague said during the commercial break.

"Are you volunteering?" Sin asked.

"Like hell I am! Screw Seto!" Plague replied.

"I'm sure you would," Sin said with a smirk. Plague snarled at him.

"Hey, the only man I'm for is Tom Cruise!" She said huffily.

"If you had to choose, who would you go out with?" Ryoko asked. Plague, although glaring, thought for a moment.

"Tristan's taken by Serenity, Mai likes Joey, Téa likes Yugi, Seto's too big of an asshole---" Plague was interrupted by Kenyamon.

"Ah, the irony," she mused. Plague glared and continued.

"Anyway, I like the Isis and Seto pairing myself, and Pegasus is gay---"

"He was married to Cecelia, how can he be gay?" Hoofamon asked.

"I'm doing the talking, shit head, so piss off!" Plague shouted. Hoofamon scooted away from her. "Yami Malik's as sexy as hell, so probably him."

"...Why?" Sin asked.

"It makes sense. Ryoko likes Malik, so it's only right if Ryoko's yami liked Malik's yami," stated Kenyamon.

"True," Shinmon agreed. They sat in silence for the rest of the episode. When the show was over, Ryoko stood up and turned off the TV and headed upstairs. The rest of the gang followed.

"Where's Zoe and Wolf?" Asked Hoofamon as he leaned on the doorframe of Ryoko's room. "They should have been here by now."

"You know Zoe and her shopping sprees," Ryoko sighed.

"All we needed was some damn milk! Doesn't she have enough clothes already?!" Plague fussed. "And why the hell did she go all the way to Bristol?! She could get milk at that discount grocery place!"

"JC Penny was having a sale, so she probably dragged Wolf to the mall," Kenyamon guessed. Muff, Ryoko's spirit beast, was curled up in his cage asleep. He resembled a sugar glider if not a bit bigger. Ryoko checked his food and water before going into her closet and rummaging around.

"Now what?" Asked Kenyamon as Ryoko grabbed her boom box and CDs.

"We've gotta clean the barn," she stated simply as she opened the door and walked out into the early summer afternoon sun. The others shrugged and followed her down the driveway.

Yugi made it to Burger World ten minutes early, but so did everyone else. Joey, Tristan, Téa, Mai, Duke, Serenity, Bakura, and Malik arrived soon after Yugi did. They all ordered their food and ate while goofing off, relaxing and enjoying the evening. They were all relieved that the school week was over. As they were eating, Tristan turned to Yugi.

"So, what's your plans for the weekend, Yugi?" He asked. Yugi stopped sipping his soda through his straw.

"Well, I haven't really thought about it," he said, setting down his cup. "What about you guys?" He asked. Everyone sat in silence.

"Wanna go to the dance club tomorrow night?" Asked Téa. Everyone looked at her.

"That's a great idea!" Serenity approved.

"Yeah, that's perfect," said Duke.

"What about durin' the day?" Asked Joey.

"We could hit the mall and hang out at someone's house," suggested Mai.

"Who's going to volunteer?" Asked Bakura. Everyone glanced at Malik. The Egyptian blinked several times.

"Who, me?" He asked.

"That fancy apartment of yours is pretty big," commented Joey.

"It's up to you, though. You need to ask your sister and see if it's okay if we hang out and play games and bring some snackage and stuff," added Tristan.

"What if she says no?" Malik asked.

"Then we'll find some place to hang out, don't worry," said Yugi. Malik smiled.

"I'll check. When I find out, I'll call you all," he said. Mai grinned.

"Alright then, sweetheart. You have my number, right?" She asked. Blushing, Malik nodded.

"Yes, I've got everyone's," he said. Téa checked her watch as the alarm went off.

"Oops!" She stood up. "Sorry, guys. I have to go. It's been fun!" Yugi's eyes saddened.

"Why do you have to leave?" He asked.

"Mom wants me to go grocery shopping for her and then stop by the book store," she explained. "You guys wanna come?" Everyone looked at each other. They were done eating and they had nothing else planned.

"Sure! We're right behind ya!" Joey exclaimed. He turned to Serenity. "Are ya comin', sis?" He asked. Serenity shook her head.

"I'd love to, Joey, but I'm going with Mai to look for some things for my school project," she said. Joey smiled. Serenity was supposed to do a model of a volcano for school. It was not due for two weeks, but she wanted to get it over with.

"Alright," Joey responded. He turned to Mai. "Take care of her, and don't drive like a maniac," he teased.

"Hey, your driving's worse than mine," Mai retorted playfully. "But I promise that I'll keep an eye on her." Everyone cleared their place and stood up. They said goodbye to Mai and Serenity before heading down the street in their little posse. Duke suggested that they go to the book store first since they had to buy some frozen food from the grocery store and did not want it to melt. As they walked into the bookstore, Malik glanced at Téa.

"What exactly are we looking for?" He asked.

"Something on the history of Ireland," she explained as she searched the shelves.

"Ireland?" Asked Bakura.

"Yeah, Mom wants to take a trip there in the fall and is interested in their history," Téa explained as she flipped through a book.

"We'll tell you if we find anything," said Tristan. He grabbed Joey's ear and dragged him along. "Come on, dog boy."

"Ow! Hey, leggo of me!" Joey protested. The gang browsed through the books for ten minutes. Bakura walked through an isle by himself, scanning over the titles on the spines of the books on the shelves on either side of him. The disheveled spine of a thick book caught his eye, causing him to stop. He carefully slid the heavy piece of literature out of its place and examined it. There was no title or author. It was a muddy green color and was covered in dust and had many scratches and tears on it. Opening the book, he blew on the pages. Countless years of dust floated through the air. Bakura could not hide the look of surprise on his face as he flipped through the pages. The book was blank! Not even a scribble could be seen! He turned as Malik walked towards him.

"What did you find?" He asked curiously. Bakura looked at the book.

"It's empty," he said quietly. Malik furrowed his brows and stared at the blank pages.

"That's strange," he observed. Bakura noticed a thick bookmark marking a page near the center of the book. He flipped it to the page and took in a sharp breath. Malik's lavender gaze widened.

"Malik, get everyone over here now," he said urgently. Malik nodded and left to find the others. Bakura stared in shock at the illustration on the page. Téa, Yugi, Joey, and Tristan arrived with Malik a few minutes later.

"Where's Duke?" Asked Yugi.

"Hey, Duke! Get over he---" Joey was put into a headlock by Tristan.

"Don't yell, you moron! This is practically a library!" He hissed.

"Hold your horses, I'm coming," said Duke's voice as it floated towards them. He appeared around the corner of the aisle. "What's up?" He asked as he stopped next to Bakura.

"Take a look at this," said Bakura. Everyone crowded around the white haired teen and stared at the page. Quiet gasps came from everyone and shocked expressions were exchanged. The black and white photograph depicted what appeared to be them on a small farm. Téa, Yugi, Bakura, and Joey were sitting on a fence while Duke leaned against it. Tristan was sitting on the ground and Malik was crouched nearby. Off to the side was Seto Kaiba and Mokuba. There were four other guys in the picture, an eagle, a sugar glider-looking creature, and four girls, two of which had fox ears and tails.

"Who are they?" Asked Duke.

"I dunno. I've never seen them before," Joey stated.

"This is weird, you guys," Téa said nervously. Yugi nodded.

"Yeah. Is there a title?" He asked. Bakura shook his head.

"No, and it's blank. See?" He flipped through the pages. "No words, not even a mark."

"Am I interrupting your story time?" Everyone looked up as Seto Kaiba approached them, Mokuba at his side.

"Story time? All I see is your ugly face!" Joey snarled. Kaiba smirked.

"You're one to talk, Wheeler. At least I didn't have to wear a mask on Halloween to keep from scaring off kids with my real face," he sneered. Joey clenched his fists.

"Watch it!" He warned.

"Knock it off! Both of you!" Téa interrupted. "For your information, Kaiba, Bakura found this really old book and the only thing in it is a picture of all of us," she explained heatedly.

"What do I care?" Asked Kaiba. Malik glared at him.

"Because you're in it, you fool!" He growled.

"Prove it," Kaiba challenged. Malik pointed to the picture as Bakura held it out for him to see. Kaiba's eyes widened in surprise. Malik smirked in satisfaction.

"You see?" He asked.

"That _IS_ you, Kaiba," Yugi stated.

"That's absurd!" Kaiba denied.

"But that's impossible! That book has to be at least fifty years old," Mokuba observed.

"Maybe it's just people that look like us," Duke suggested.

"I dunno," Tristan mused doubtfully. "I highly doubt that we have clones."

"Get real," Kaiba snorted. Suddenly, the illustration began to glow. The book grew red hot and Bakura dropped it for fear of it bursting into flames.

"Uh, shouldn't we get somebody?" Joey asked. A yellow and orange cyclone suddenly erupted from the page with the illustration. Mokuba leapt back.

"Woah!" He cried, shielding his face. The swirling mass of light seemed to pull them in. They held onto each other and the shelves, bracing themselves against the force of the swirling mass of light. It did no good. Yugi, Bakura, Malik, Joey, Tristan, Téa, Duke, Mokuba, and Kaiba were sucked into the book. The fiery cyclone vanished and the book slammed shut.


	3. Just Dropping In

DISCLAIMER: I do not own "Yu-Gi-Oh!" or "Dragonball Z" (though I wish that I did). Kitt, Kat, Risika, Tengu, Tigra, and Koneko belong to AnimeKat 2002. Prue, Nikkia, Aerro, and Mackenzie belong to Prudence. However, I do own Ryoko, Hoofamon, Kenyamon, Shinmon, Plague, Zoe, Wolf, Merlin, Muff, and Sin.

Just Dropping In

"Could someone _PLEASE_ tell me why the hell we're down here, again?" Asked Plague in an annoyed tone of voice as she sat on the tack room steps. She had her elbows on her knees, propping her head up with her hands. Ryoko threw a heaping snow shovel full of debris into the manure pile, her small biceps gleaming with sweat. She wiped her brow with her arm.

"Because you're supposed to muck out stalls every day," she explained, crossing her hands on top of the shovel and resting her chin on them.

"Horses shit too much," Plague complained. Ryoko rolled her eyes.

"True, but who doesn't? And don't swear, it's immature and makes you look like you don't have a wide range of vocabulary," she scolded.

"I have a much wider range of vocabulary than you do. I've invented new words!" Plague bragged.

"It makes you appear uncivilized," pressed Ryoko. Plague snorted with laughter.

"So?" She asked in a smart-alecky way.

"It also makes you appear ignorant," Ryoko retorted.

"She doesn't need swearing to prove that," Sin said. He was sitting on the stairs that lead to the hayloft, wrapped in his tattered red cloak and his disk-like straw ronin gasa hat.

"What the hell does that mean?!" Plague spat. "And why the hell are you wearing that cloak over leather? It's eighty seven degrees!"

"I do what I damn well please, so fuck off," Sin stated irritably. Ryoko sighed and scratched the back of her head before she walked back into the stall and continued to muck it out. Plague growled and shot Sin a nasty look. He sneered at her and she flipped him off with both hands. Hoofamon galloped into the barn. He was in his true form: a winged unicorn. The rookie Digimon stood at 20.5 hands high, (or 7' 10'' at his shoulder), and had a pink coat. His hooves and horn were a special form of gold that was a hundred times harder than diamonds. His long sky blue mane reached his knees and his tail was the same color and dragged five feet behind him and was proudly arched. He had sky blue feathering on the back of all four legs and sky blue eyes. The smaller inner feathers of his wings were sky blue as well. He had a wingspan of 15 feet and was of Egyptian Arabian build. His muscles gleamed in the bright sunlight and powerfully rippled under his sweaty coat. On each of his hindquarters was a large crest. It was circular in shape and part of it looked like a silver crescent moon, the remainder of the circle being a smaller sky blue jewel. The magnificent stallion flared his nostrils, his tail flagged like a banner as he slowed to a trot. He stopped in front of the last stall---then jerked his head back abruptly before the shovel hit him in the face. Ryoko jumped when she spotted him.

"Crap, man, you scared me!" She laughed as she threw the muck over the fence.

"You nearly hit me in the face with that," Hoofamon said, one ear pricked and the other flopped out to the side, his head cocked to the left.

"You were lucky that time, pony boy," crowed Plague. Hoofamon looked over his back, flicking his tail in annoyance and laying his ears back.

"I'm not a pony," he said. Plague smirked.

"Oh, you're not?" She took out her grenade launcher and cocked it. Hoofamon squealed and took a few tentative steps away from the psycho girl.

"A dark cloud of misfortune hovers above you, bro." Everyone turned at Kenyamon's voice as she loped into the barn. Her true rookie Digimon form was a creamy yellow tiger-sized fennec fox with aqua green dragon wings. Her legs, ear tips, tail tip, chest, and stomach were white and her paw pads and nose were a cute pink. On her right hind leg was a gold bracelet. On her front legs were two purple sock-like pieces of fabric with black and white yin yangs on them. She had a blonde mane and forelock much like a horse, which came from her and Hoofamon's father. She had a gold earring on the tip of her left ear with an orange feather dangling from it while her right ear had two black earrings connected with a delicate gold chain, elaborately curved purple markings under and around her sky blue eyes. Her hindquarters sported the same crest as her half-brother's as well. Hoofamon smiled at his little sister.

"I'm just unlucky, I guess," he said with a snort.

"You have always been unlucky," said Shinmon as he approached. His Digimon form was slightly bigger than Kenyamon's. The cat-like creature was a rookie as well. He had lavender fur and a white chest, stomach, tail, ear tips, and mohawk-like crest of hair running from between his shoulder blades to the top of his head. His dragon wings were silver. On his front legs were red wristbands and his nose and paw pads were black. On the tip of his right ear was a gold hoop earring while both of the ears had two black and silver studs. His black eyes were almond shaped and he had long black whiskers. His hindquarters were decorated in his own personal crest. Like Kenyamon's and Hoofamon's, his had a crescent moon, only it was midnight blue. The jewel was orange and had a single red star in the center. Everyone referred to it as a dragonball. Hoofamon whickered softly.

"I know. I don't think that I could get any unluckier." As if on cue, a mass of bodies fell from a swirling portal high above him. The people fell on top of him, causing him to fall to the ground. Everyone stared in shock and Sin stood up, cloak and hat thrown aside and sword held at the ready in the blink of an eye. Ryoko peeked out of the stall.

"Hoofamon!" She cried. The stallion's feathered wings were disheveled and his satiny mane ruffled.

"I think that it's clear that you _CAN_ get unluckier," mused Plague. Hoofamon moaned.

"Yeah. Like I said: unlucky." He opened his eyes and turned his head and came face-to-face with Téa---literally. She groaned in pain.

"Ow, my head," she said weakly, clutching the side of her head. Her blue eyes flew open as Hoofamon breathed in her face. "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!" She screamed, leaping to her feet. "WHAT THE HECK IS THAT THING?!" Hoofamon acted hurt.

"Well, thanks a lot," he grumbled. Everyone braced themselves.

"OH MY GOSH, IT TALKS!!!" Téa freaked.

"I just happen to be a he, okay, Téa?" He said. Plague looked at Kenyamon.

"Téa?" She asked. Hoofamon, realizing what he had just said, blinked several times and shook his head.

"Téa? Téa Gardner?" He asked. Téa's face grew pale.

"How'd you know my name? And where am I?" She asked, looking around.

"Man, that was rough," said Duke, sitting up from his place on Hoofamon's hindquarters. Joey, Tristan, Yugi, Bakura, Mokuba, and Kaiba sat up at the same time.

"What happened?" Groaned Joey.

"I have no idea," Yugi replied. They looked at each other and then looked up at everyone else. "...Um... Hi?" He said nervously. Kenyamon stared at him. "Is---er---something wrong?" He asked her.

"Other than the crazy-assed fact that you're not supposed to exist and you're squashing her brother, not a damn thing," said Plague as she ate a pickle. Sin sighed and put away his sword.

"What in God's name is going on?" He asked.

"Ha! Apparently you don't know everything, wise ass!" Plague shouted in triumph.

"Shut up, ditz shit," Sin growled. Kaiba stood up and dusted himself off, Mokuba following suit. Tristan got up and helped Joey to his feet. Yugi scratched the back of his head and looked down from his perch across Hoofamon's neck.

"Any day, now," Hoofamon said irritably.

"Oh!" Yugi quickly got off of him. "Sorry!" Bakura untangled himself from Hoofamon's tail and got to his feet. He looked down at Kenyamon.

"Are we in the middle of a duel?" He asked, eyeing the strange creature and assuming that she was a card hologram. Kenyamon's eyes got big and watery.

"B---B---Bakura-sama?" She stuttered in a squeaky voice. Bakura, surprised though he was, nodded uneasily. "BAKURA-SAMA!!!" The giant fox dragon tackled him to the ground. "BAKURA-SAMA, YOU'RE SO AWESOME!!! I LOVE YOU TO DEATH!!!" Everyone stared at her as she licked his face.

"Control your hormones, bitch!" Plague shouted. Kenyamon stopped and looked over at her.

"I think that's your title," she said.

"Hey, who's the canine around here?" Plague asked. "Besides, I'm not _A_ psycho bitch, I'm _THE_ psycho bitch." Sin grunted, apparently not amused. Bakura attempted to get up, but Kenyamon pinned him back down and nuzzled his hair.

"Kenyamon, you're suffocate the boy," said Ryoko. Kenyamon quickly got off of him and Bakura leapt to his feet and backed away from her. Yugi looked at Téa.

"Are you all right, Téa?" He asked. She nodded and stood next to him. Joey looked around.

"Hey, where's Malik?" He asked. Ryoko's ears pricked forward.

"Malik?" She asked. Everyone looked down at the scruffy Hoofamon as a groan was heard. One of his massive wings moved and Malik emerged from underneath it. Ryoko's eyes got as big as saucers and her mouth was agape as he stood up, his back to her.

"What happened?" He asked, rubbing the back of his head. Everyone pointed at Ryoko and he turned around and faced her. Her cheeks blushed crimson and she darted into the stall and leaned against the wall, snow shovel in hand. He was real! They were all real! What was going on?


	4. Getting Acquainted

DISCLAIMER: I do not own "Yu-Gi-Oh!" or "Dragonball Z" (though I wish that I did). Kitt, Kat, Risika, Tengu, Tigra, and Koneko belong to AnimeKat 2002. Prue, Nikkia, Aerro, and Mackenzie belong to Prudence. However, I do own Ryoko, Hoofamon, Kenyamon, Shinmon, Plague, Zoe, Wolf, Merlin, Muff, and Sin.

Getting Acquainted

"Um, excuse me, miss?" Ryoko jumped and looked over at the doorway of the stall. Malik was standing there watching her. "Who are you and what's going on?" He asked. Ryoko twitched her tail.

"I should ask you the same question---at least, the second one." Malik blinked once, a questionable expression on his face. Ryoko sweatdropped. "I know that you're Malik Isht---" She clasped her hands over her mouth. She was going to freak him out! Malik stared at her.

"How did you know my name?" He asked uneasily. Ryoko took her hands away from her face and waved.

"Hi! I'm Ryoko!" She chirped. Plague and Kenyamon facefell while everyone else just watched them with clueless expressions. Malik smiled at Ryoko.

"Well, nice to meet you, Ryoko," he said. Ryoko felt as if she would melt. The way that he said her name---there was something about it that made her feel all tingly inside.

"Before I tell you how I know your name, how did you end up here in the first place?" Ryoko asked. Malik leaned against the opposite wall of the stall, crossing his arms and ignoring the helpless cries of Bakura as Kenyamon began licking him again.

"Téa was looking for something on Ireland in the book store when Bakura found this very old book. It was blank, all except for one page." Malik's gaze darkened and he leaned his head back on the wall, keeping his eyes on the strange fox girl. "That page had a photo of all of us around a fence. There were other people in the picture, but we didn't recognize them---until we saw you guys." Ryoko cocked her head to the side.

"An old book with no words?" She asked. Malik closed his eyes.

"Kaiba came with Mokuba and began taunting us. When we showed him that he was in the picture as well, he denied it. That's when---" He turned his head to the side, staring out of the stall door, watching Hoofamon as he got to his hooves and began shaking dust from his coat and preening his wings. "---That's when the book turned red hot. Bakura dropped it and this massive whirlwind of fiery light appeared. It dragged us into the pages and the next thing we know---"

"---You literally drop in on us," Ryoko finished. Malik's gaze shifted to her once more, though he kept his head turned away.

"Yes," he said. Ryoko tugged on one of her ears and stared at the shovel handle as she thought. Malik watched her from the corners of his eyes.

"Well, that's pretty weird," she said uncertainly. Malik turned his head towards her once more.

"You don't believe me," he stated flatly. It was not in the form of a question. Ryoko looked at him.

"I believe you," she responded coolly. A startled expression crossed Malik's handsome features.

"Really? Why?" He asked. Ryoko smirked and scratched her nose.

"Well, you dropped in on us and you're not supposed to exist, so there's really no other explanation," she explained. Malik smirked.

"Speaking of which, what do you mean by us not being real?" He asked. Ryoko walked towards the open door, shovel in hand.

"You're on TV," she answered plainly as she passed him. Malik's eyes widened.

"What?!" He asked. Ryoko headed out of the stall and looked at everyone. Yes, they were real. At least, it looked that way. Kenyamon, seeing Ryoko, ceased licking Bakura and crept away, wagging her tail happily and squirming with delight that Bakura was there. Tristan hauled the drool-covered Bakura to his feet. Malik walked out of the stall, one hand on the doorframe.

"So, because we're on some show means that we're not real?" He asked. Before Ryoko could answer, Plague narrowed her eyes and smirked slyly.

"Let's find out, shall we?" She asked. She grabbed the shovel from Ryoko's hand and whacked Kaiba across the head with the broad metal end, causing him to hit his head on the gate.

"Seto! Are you okay?" Mokuba asked worriedly. Seto ignored his brother. Instead, he clutched his head and glared at Plague.

"WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA, YOU FREAK?!" He roared. Plague cackled insanely. Ryoko stormed up to her, punched her in the back of the head, and grabbed the shovel.

"That wasn't very nice, but it answers our question," she observed. Plague studied her nails, seemingly proud of herself. Everyone stared at her nervously.

"Did she just do what I thought she did?" Asked Joey.

"She just hit Kaiba with a shovel!" Exclaimed Téa. Kaiba growled at Plague.

"I asked you a question!" He snarled.

"Kiss my fuzzy white ass!" Plague retorted. "I can beat your spoiled, little rich boy ass any day!" Kaiba took a threatening step forward.

"Is that a challenge?" He asked. Plague took a fighting stance.

"No shit, Sherlock," she replied cockily.

"Guys, knock it off!" Pleaded Téa. Ryoko looked over at Sin. The samurai nodded and put his arms up under Plague's and behind her head, dragging her backwards.

"WHAT THE HELL?! DAMMIT, YOU GOTH ASSHOLE, LEMME GO!!! I'VE GOTTA TEACH THAT BASTARD A LESSON!!!" She shouted as he dragged her away.

"Calm your ass down," he said calmly. Plague slipped out of Sin's grasp and flipped over his head, landing behind him. She kicked out, but her foot narrowly missed him as he moved out of the way with supernatural speed.

"Only an amateur attacks from behind," he stated coldly, his back still turned to her. She growled as he looked over his shoulder at her. Yugi looked at Ryoko.

"Do they do this often?" He asked. Ryoko nodded.

"It's an every day routine, you get used to it," she sighed. Kaiba shot death glares at Plague. Ryoko cleared her throat.

"So, we all know who you guys are, but you don't know us," she said cheerily as Sin and Plague began beating each other up in the background. "I'm Ryoko! This is Shinmon, Kenyamon---" Kenyamon transformed into her human form, receiving astounded stares. She dusted off her shoulder.

"This isn't my real form, but I use it a lot when we go out in public," she explained. She glanced at Bakura. "Don't worry, I won't be licking your face in this form," she giggled. Bakura blushed and scratched the back of his head, laughing quietly. Hoofamon transformed into his human form as well. Before Téa knew what was happening, he had her hand in his, kneeling on one knee.

"I'm Hoofamon, but you can call me your stud," he said silkily. Kenyamon punched him in the head, causing him to let go of Téa's hand and fall to the ground.

"Knock it off, you pimp! You're acting just like Brock! Besides, she's taken, and so are you," she scolded. Hoofamon got to his feet and looked down at Yugi, who had his fists clenched. He sweatdropped.

"I forgot... But I'm not taken," he said. Kenyamon smirked.

"Oh, really? What would Kat say about that?" She asked. Hoofamon blushed a deep crimson. Shinmon, shrugging, went into his human form and leaned against the wall. Ryoko sighed.

"Anyway, the two people behind me are Sin and Plague," she explained. Everyone looked at Plague as Sin sat on her and pulled her ears.

"She kinda looks like you," Duke stated as Plague began choking Sin with her tail.

"That's because she's my yami," Ryoko replied. Yugi looked at her with surprise.

"You have a yami, too?" He asked, astonished. Ryoko nodded.

"Yeah," she answered. "We're one in the same." Kaiba grunted.

"Since you know who we are, introductions are over," he said. "Now, tell me how to get back," he demanded. Everyone glared at him.

"That qualifies as rude," Joey warned.

"Quiet, Wheeler," Kaiba responded.

"Don't boss me around, punk!" Joey hissed. Ryoko looked at Kaiba.

"I'm sorry, dude, I don't have an answer for ya," she said. Kaiba glared at the ground. "But I'll be more than happy to help you find your way back." Everyone looked at her again.

"You serious?" Asked Yugi. Ryoko nodded. She looked at Malik, who was in deep thought. "Hey, Mr. Antisocial, get on over here," she quipped. Malik snapped his head up.

"Excuse me?" He asked. Ryoko motioned for him to come over. He hesitantly obeyed and stood by Bakura. Ryoko looked over their heads, smiled, and looked back at them.

"...What?" Asked Tristan.

"I'd move back if I were you," she said. The thundering of hooves could be heard, coming nearer. Everyone turned and looked over the gate as five horses galloped towards them. Sin dragged Plague to the stairs as the horses trotted into the barn. Everyone leapt back as an old black Tennessee Walker mare with white hind socks lumbered into the barn. Ryoko watched her.

"There's Midnight," she mused to herself. A tall bay Arabian gelding with a blaze and white front left sock followed. "And there's Khemistry," Ryoko continued. A small bay Arabian mare followed her half-brother. "There's Asil." Téa took in a sharp breath as a small foal cantered after his mother. He was a dark gray with black legs, leg barring, ear tips, gray hooves, and red eyes. His spiky black mane and tail seemed to have blue highlights and his forelock had a jagged white streak in the shape of an arch. On his forehead was a white marking in the shape of an eye. "There goes Hiei." An older colt followed his younger brother. He was a liver chestnut with a light flaxen mane and tail. His hooves were the color of aged ivory and his purple eyes had black lines sharply curving under them. Like his brother, he had a white eye marking on his forehead. The horses eyed the newcomers warily before heading into the second pasture to graze. Ryoko smiled to herself and headed to the tack room.

"Hey, what was that last one's name?" Asked Bakura.

"Malik," she said as she opened the tack room door. Everyone turned to the human Malik, who was looking from the colt to Ryoko.

"Why?" He asked. Ryoko peeked out of the tack room.

"Because you're my favorite character," she stated as a matter-of-factly. Malik gazed at her with a blank and bewildered expression as she put up the shovel and emerged from the room, shutting the door and locking it. Wiping the back of her neck with a red bandana, she picked up her boom box and CDs and turned to everyone.

"Alright, people. Follow me to the house and we'll see what we can do," she said as she jumped the fence. After a short pause, the group followed her up the driveway.


	5. Can I Keep Them?

DISCLAIMER: I do not own "Yu-Gi-Oh!" or "Dragonball Z" (though I wish that I did). Kitt, Kat, Risika, Tengu, Tigra, and Koneko belong to AnimeKat 2002. Prue, Nikkia, Aerro, and Mackenzie belong to Prudence. However, I do own Ryoko, Hoofamon, Kenyamon, Shinmon, Plague, Zoe, Wolf, Merlin, Muff, and Sin.

"Can I Keep Them?"

"Okay, rule number one: Do as I say. Rule number two: Don't talk to me if I'm pissed. Rule number three---"

"Ignore her," Ryoko said as she interrupted Plague as they stood on the front porch.

"Ass fox!" Plague snarled.

"You're one to talk," Ryoko sighed. Kaiba smirked.

"Use your head next time, freak," he snorted. Plague picked up a chair and raised it above her head.

"I'LL SHOW YOU 'USING YOUR HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!'" She screeched. Ryoko grabbed the chair and smacked Plague across the face with it before setting it down. As Plague fell onto her face, Mokuba, Malik, Joey, Tristan, Duke, Bakura, Téa, and Yugi stared in shock. Ryoko looked at them.

"What?" She asked.

"You just---Is she---" Duke stammered.

"She beat the shit out of her and she's fine," Sin finished.

"Exactly!" Ryoko quipped happily.

"How could she be fine if she was hit across the face with a chair?!" Mokuba demanded.

"When the aliens abducted her, they performed all kinds of weird stuff, so she has super strength. Not even getting hit by a tank can kill her," Kenyamon explained. Everyone stared.

"And how would you know this?" Bakura asked.

"Trust me, we've tried," Hoofamon replied.

"Actually, it was a rocket launcher last time, thanks to Kat," Shinmon added.

"Then she shot me with it when I started laughing," Hoofamon said glumly.

"Good thing you are immortal," Shinmon observed. Yugi looked at him.

"Can I ask you a question?" He asked. Shinmon nodded. "Why do you wear a beanie and a jacket when it's this hot out?" Yugi asked. Shinmon's cheeks burned and he looked down at his large feet.

"He's just shy about his appearance," Kenyamon quickly explained.

"Why's that?" Joey asked. Ryoko looked at Shinmon.

"No use hiding it, bud," she said gently. Shinmon, sighing, unwrapped the coat from around his waist, revealing his large, fluffy white tail. Next, he took off his socks, revealing his lavender cat paws. He hesitated a moment before taking the beanie off of his head, his lavender and white pierced ears flopped out to the side in shame. Everyone, as shocked as they were, stared at Téa and braced themselves. However, she did not scream this time.

"Aww, how cute!" She commented. Plague stood up, rubbing her face.

"I guess she's gotten used to all of the weird shit around here, already," she said to Kenyamon as she shot a death glare at her hikari.

"Wait 'til she gets to school," Kenyamon replied uneasily.

"I would rather appear more normal," Shinmon explained, glancing at Hoofamon and Sin. "Even though Ryoko and Plague are not embarrassed or ashamed with their appearances, I am with mine."

"Well, we're all different. The inside's what matters," Téa said hopefully. Shinmon smiled briefly and his ears perked up a little more.

"Besides, that's not the only reason he disguises himself," said Ryoko. Tristan looked at her.

"What's the other reason?" He asked.

"Kitt," Ryoko, Kenyamon, Plague, Hoofamon, Sin, and Shinmon said at the same time.

"Who's that?" asked Malik.

"One of my best friends. She's obsessed with cats," Ryoko explained.

"So he's afraid of her?" Mokuba asked.

"Not really afraid of _HER_, just the way she acts. You'll see why tomorrow," answered Kenyamon.

"Alright, just let me do all of the talking," Ryoko said as she turned the doorknob. The cool air from the air conditioning made everyone sigh in relief. Finally, a cool place out of this heat!

"Jeez, are you rich?" Duke asked, eyeing the large interior of the house. "I mean, I know that the outside's big, but this---" He looked at the fireplace in the living room and let out a long whistle.

"Nah, we're not rich. Starting from the doorframe over there by the bar and all the way back to the apartment and garage is a new addition that was built about two years ago," Hoofamon said as he closed the door.

"Mom, I'm back!" Ryoko called.

"Hi, honey! Did you get a lot done?" Everyone watched as a beautiful blonde woman in her forties walked out of the kitchen. Named Kim, she was the same height as Ryoko if not a bit shorter. Slim and tan, she wore faded blue jeans and a baggy black t-shirt. The toe rings on her bare feet hinted at her past "hippie chick" life. Her hair reached a little below her shoulders and her eyes were the same blue as her daughter's. If he did not know any better, Joey could have sworn that they were sisters---only that Ryoko was the one who inherit the weird gene.

"Yeah, 'tis all cleaned," Ryoko responded. Her mother skidded to a halt when she spotted the larger-than-normal group behind her daughter. She looked at Ryoko.

"You didn't tell me that you were having friends over," she said gently, though Ryoko knew that she was pretty annoyed.

"Yeah, can I keep them?" Ryoko asked. Kim let out a small laugh. Ryoko looked at Hoofamon.

"Show them around and I'll handle Mom," she whispered. Hoofamon nodded and Ryoko looked back at her mother. "Mom, I can explain." Kim raised an eyebrow.

"Everyone, cheese it!" Plague shouted in panic, grabbing Yugi by the leg and dragging him down the hall to Ryoko's room. She did _NOT_ like the look on her mother's face!

"Well---um---make yourselves at home and help yourselves to the fridge!" Kim called as everyone followed Plague, attempting to rescue the helpless Yugi.

"Thank you, ma'am," Téa responded with a traditional Japanese bow before following the others. When they were out of earshot, Kim looked at Ryoko.

"Let's go to your room, sit down, and don't freak out while I explain," Ryoko said, grabbing her mother's hand and leading her to the master bedroom.

"It's gonna rain," Kenyamon said.

"Random, much?" Hoofamon asked. By now, the group was in Ryoko's room. Yugi had escaped Plague and was now sitting as far away from her as possible on the floor next to Muff's cage with Mokuba. Yami Yugi had decided to appear as well, extremely offended with the way Plague had dragged his hikari down the hallway and nearly took his head off with the door frame. Plague and Kenyamon were on the bed while Téa was sitting in a chair. Sin, as usual, was in the furthest and darkest corner of the room while everyone else were either scattered on the floor sitting down or standing up and leaning against the wall.

"But there's no rain clouds," Duke said.

"The cows are lying down," Shinmon replied.

"What's that got to do with rain?" Kaiba asked.

"Dammit, use common sense, ass wipe!" Plague growled.

"I have more than you do," he retorted.

"Hey, I have common sense, it's just that I choose to not use it," Plague snarled.

"It's country slang. When cows are lying down, it's gonna rain. It's just like mayonnaise," Kenyamon explained. Shinmon's ears perked up at the mentioning of his favorite food.

"Mayonnaise?" Joey asked.

"Yeah, as in, 'Mayonnaise a lot of people out there,'" Plague said. The new arrivals stared at her. "HOLY HELL, YOU'VE GOT A LOT TO LEARN!!!" She half-screamed.

"If someone shouts, 'Hoedown,' and your girlfriend hits the floor, you might be a redneck!" Kenyamon crowed. Everyone's gaze shifted to her as she continued. "If the most common phrase in your household is, 'Somebody go jiggle the handle,' you might be a redneck."

"Yep, that's a common phrase in this house thanks to Ryoko's brother," Hoofamon commented as his sister continued ranting.

"If you constantly have people knocking on your door because they mistook your front lawn for a yard sale, you might be a redneck. And could you just see the Olympics in Georgia? The Olympic rings will be five old tires nailed together because they burn a long time! And they'll be doing the high jump over a clothes line!" Kenyamon was soon joined by Plague.

"And you know they don't even realize it, but the river they're doing the kayaking on is the same river they filmed 'Deliverance' at. And if Ned Badie couldn't make it down that river, a Frenchman in a pair of bicycle shorts ain't got a chance," Plague added, snorting with laughter. Everyone stared at her and Kenyamon with blank expressions.

"Jeff Foxworthy," Sin sighed.

"Who's that?" Tristan asked. Kenyamon and Plague both fell off of the bed onto their faces.

"You've never heard of the great Jeff Foxworthy?" Kenyamon asked, close to tears as she looked up at everyone. Bakura sweatdropped, afraid that she was going to start crying.

"Sorry, you have to remember that we're not from around here," Joey apologized.

"He's only the greatest comedian ever," Ryoko said. Malik jumped from his spot on the floor next to the door when she spoke. The fox girl was leaning on the door frame, watching everyone.

"How'd it go?" Kenyamon asked.

"I'm not sure if she believes me, but she'll tolerate everyone as long as the boys sleep separate from the girls," Ryoko explained. "We've got two guestrooms and an apartment, so it's up to everyone who crashes where. But I think it would be better if the girls stayed in my room and in the guestroom across the hall and the guys could be in the downstairs guestroom and the apartment."

"Sounds good to me," agreed Tristan.

"And I suppose that Plague freaked you all out and you haven't seen the entire house, yet?" Asked Ryoko. Everyone nodded.

"Don't blame me, fox shit!" Plague yelled. Joey walked over to a closed door.

"What's this?" He asked Ryoko.

"My bathroom. You can open it if you want," she said. Hoofamon's face lost all color.

"What's in it?" Joey asked.

"Bathroom stuff, you spaz," Téa said as Joey turned the handle. Hoofamon let out a frightened squeak as the door opened.

"SHUT IT!!! SHUT IT!!!" He screamed.

"REEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOWRRRRR!!!" A demonic screaming and hissing sound was heard. Joey screamed as a black, white, and yellow ball of fur leaped from atop the shower curtain rack towards his face. He quickly slammed the door shut. A loud thudding noise was heard on the other side of the door followed by ripping and crunching sounds. Joey leapt back with a frightened yell as claws began ripping through the wood.

"WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?!" He freaked as he fell onto Tristan.

"That's my kitten!" Ryoko said with a joyful note in her voice. Everyone stared at her with their mouths agape in disbelief.

"It's a demon, that's what it is!" Joey wheezed, clutching at a stitch in his chest.

"The Spawn of Satan," Hoofamon shuddered. Yami Yugi looked at him.

"No wonder you didn't want him to open the door," he said with a wry smile.

"Hi, Yami!" Ryoko said with a wave, noticing him for the first time. "Kitt's gonna love to see you!" Yami smiled nervously as loud hissing and spitting could be heard from the bathroom

"Let me guess... Eikichi?" Everyone turned as a black skinned girl with short red hair and green eyes stood in the doorway.

"Eikichi? Is that the name of that thing?" Duke asked. The girl nodded.

"Yeah. And my name's Zoe," she said. The girl was Plague's height and wore strapped high heels, a mini skirt, and blouse. She was all about fashion and attitude. She had a red purse hanging from her shoulder and some JC Penny bags in her hands. Half Egyptian and half African, her nails and lips were purple and she looked like a runway model.

"WHERE THE _HELL_ HAVE YOU BEEN?! ALL WE NEEDED WAS SOME DAMN MILK!!!" Plague shouted in fury. Everyone but Ryoko, Kenyamon, Sin, Kaiba, and Zoe shrank back in fear. Zoe, setting down her bags, put one hand on her hip.

"Don't sass me, bitch! I got the milk!" Zoe retorted. "Three jugs, to be exact! Besides, whose fault is it that we ran out?"

"There was sake involved!" Plague said, embarrassed and angry at the same time. "It's Sin's fault that he let me have a swig!"

"You stole my whole damn bottle..." Sin whispered dangerously.

"Who in their right mind would try to see if chickens could make chocolate milk?" Ryoko asked. "Plague, chickens don't work that way, cows do. Chickens make eggs, not milk. Fake udders don't help out, either. Chickens don't have those," Ryoko scolded. Even Kaiba seemed appalled by this news as he put the pieces together in his head.

"She's never been in her right mind," Hoofamon said. Plague put her hand on the bathroom doorknob. Hoofamon shut his mouth and backed away from her.

"That's better," Plague said, smirking and letting go of the door. Zoe suddenly noticed everyone in the room.

"What the fuck!?" She asked with shock.

"Long story short, they dropped in on us and we have to help them find a way back to their world," Hoofamon said, rubbing the back of his neck as he remembered everyone crushing him. Zoe, though a bit skeptical, nodded.

"Anyway, it appears that I was right about the JC Penny thing," Ryoko said, eyeing the bulging bags of clothes. Zoe's face lit up.

"Oh my God, I got the cutest shoes!" She squealed, rummaging around in one of her bags.

"Where's Wolf?" Kenyamon asked.

"Right here." A teen about Sin's height appeared behind Zoe, a large gray harpy eagle on his shoulder. Dressed in blue jeans with black chaps over them, he wore a black leather vest with a hood and a leather bracelet. Around his neck was a silver necklace of a disfigured eagle claw holding a round gem. Even Téa couldn't help but stare at his bare chest. His shaggy brown hair elegantly fell into his face and was tied back in a low ponytail. His right eye was almost completely covered by his long bangs. Therefore, everyone assumed that by looking at his other eye that the right one was the same earthy brown as well. However, he pushed his bangs out of his eyes, revealing that his right eye was actually _NOT_ brown. What should have been the white of his eye was black, while what should have been brown like his other eye was yellow---like a wolf's eye. One look at his dark skin and one could easily tell that he was of Native American origin. The eagle on his shoulder, Merlin, had leather tied around one of his legs and a gold hoop pierced in one of his wings. The great bird of prey clicked his beak when he saw the newcomers, his crown of feathers standing on end. Wolf gently stroked the bird's chest and he relaxed.

"Did you have fun?" Shinmon asked. Wolf rolled his eyes, but smiled.

"Yeah, but remind me to go with someone who doesn't have to shop for three hours in a clothing store when all we needed to get was groceries," he said. He glanced at everyone. He made sure to give Sin a loathing glance before looking at Ryoko.

"To make a long story short"---Ryoko began, but Wolf held up a hand.

"I heard you tell Zoe, so there's no need," he said gently.

"Come on, you bitch," Zoe muttered as she tried to pull a box out of one of her bags. Mokuba looked at Kenyamon questioningly.

"Mokuba, whatever you hear, don't repeat it," Kenyamon said nervously. The young boy looked at Kaiba. His big brother glanced at Kenyamon, then Mokuba, and nodded. Ryoko walked over to her bathroom door.

"If you open that, so help me---" Joey began as he backed away. However, when Ryoko opened the door, there was no monster. Only a small mostly black calico kitten sat on the floor, her big green eyes staring up at her owner with adoration. She let out a small "meow" as Ryoko picked her up.

"Aww, she's so cute," Téa said as she petted the now harmless kitten on the head.

"You just wait 'til she bites off your fingers," Hoofamon said as Eikichi began purring. The kitten's gaze locked on his. "Please have mercy on me, oh merciless one," he whimpered.

"We have another cat named Wolverine. He's orange, fat, and drunk," Ryoko explained happily.

"Drunk?" Malik asked.

"Yeah, wait 'til you see him!" Ryoko chirped. "He opens his mouth to meow and nothing comes out. And he staggers around with his tongue hanging out, but he's perfectly healthy." Malik stared at her as if she was from another planet.

"Ha! I've got it!" Everyone looked at Zoe once more, who was now holding up a pair of hemp high heel sandals.

"Haven't you got enough damn shoes already?" Plague asked irritably.

"A woman can never have too many shoes," Zoe said.

"Until they take up an entire damn closet," Plague mumbled under her breath. Téa hid a smile as she tried to keep herself from laughing.

"Ryoko, I found the cutest shirt!" Zoe pulled out a belly shirt with an extremely low cut top and held it up.

"It's pink," Ryoko noted, flicking the tip of her tail as she handed a surprised Shinmon the psycho cat. As he held the kitten, Eikichi rubbed her head against his chest. Apparently, she liked him for obvious reasons.

"I know! I got this for you and something for Kenyamon!" She explained happily, tossing it to Ryoko. The shirt landed on Ryoko's face and she cringed. Something pink had touched her... Well, it was the thought that counted. She took the shirt off of her head and folded it.

"Um, thank you, Zoe. You didn't have to," she said, blushing.

"Nah, I wanted to," Zoe replied as she threw a pair of flair jeans with gold trim and a matching belt at Kenyamon.

"SHINY!!!" Kenyamon squealed as she stared at the gold belt. Ryoko looked at the pink shirt. Well, maybe something pink wouldn't be all that bad, but she'd definitely have to wear something under it. Zoe then tossed a Hot Topic bag at Plague, who caught it as it flew by her head. Ryoko put the shirt in her closet before turning around to face everyone.

"So, I'm guessing that you know who Wolf and Zoe are. The eagle's Merlin, by the way," she explained. "And I might as well take you all on a tour of the house since everything's settled down. You're more than welcome to take showers and eat and everything. I'll call the school here in a bit to let them know that you're coming and I'll say that you're exchange students, savvy?" Hesitantly, everyone nodded. Plague squealed as she pulled out a tight fitting Slipknot t-shirt and glomped Zoe. Ryoko, Hoofamon, Shinmon, Wolf, and Kenyamon stared.

"Oh my God," Wolf said in disbelief.

"It's the end of the world as we know it," Hoofamon said as Plague thanked Zoe.

"What's wrong?" Yami Yugi asked. Ryoko looked at him.

"They practically hate each other---Well, okay, Plague hates Sin more---but still, this is _SO_ not normal," she replied. Duke snorted at the irony. Without warning, Eikichi randomly jumped from Shinmon's arms and latched onto Hoofamon's face. Screaming like a little girl, he ran from the room.

"GET IT OFF!!!" He screamed as he ran down the hall. Eikichi leapt off of him just before he ran headfirst into the wall. Everyone winced.

"I bet that's gonna leave a nasty mark," Joey said.

"Hoofamon!" Ryoko shouted as she ran to him and yanked him up by the shirt with surprising strength. "Are you okay?!" She asked. Hoofamon, his face covered in scratches that immediately began to rapidly heal, nodded shakily. Sin moodily left Ryoko's bedroom and sighed as he went to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator.

"Tomorrow's going to be wild..."


	6. First Day of School

DISCLAIMER: I do not own "Yu-Gi-Oh!" or "Dragonball Z" (though I wish that I did). Kitt, Kat, Risika, Tengu, Tigra, and Koneko belong to AnimeKat 2002. Prue, Nikkia, Aerro, and Mackenzie belong to Prudence. However, I do own Ryoko, Hoofamon, Kenyamon, Shinmon, Plague, Zoe, Wolf, Merlin, Muff, and Sin.

First Day of School

The next morning, after getting everyone up and eating breakfast, Ryoko, Plague, Sin, Wolf, Zoe, Shinmon, Hoofamon, Kenyamon, Yugi, Téa, Malik, Mokuba, Bakura, Duke, Tristan, Joey, and Kaiba all somehow managed to fit into the cramped school bus #28. The bus driver, Steve, was extremely suspicious and asked Ryoko who the new guests were.

"Foreign exchange students," she explained with an innocent shrug. Duke looked over at Sin.

"Man, for living out in the middle of nowhere, there sure are a lot of kids," he said in wonder. Sin merely nodded and did not say a word.

"MOVE, YOU LITTE SHIT!!!" Plague screamed as she shoved an elementary kid out of his seat at the back of the bus. Ryoko sat with her friend, Abram, as usual. A healthy sized sophomore whom Ryoko had known since the sixth grade, he had short cropped brown hair and gray eyes.

"Are they who I think they are?" He asked in astonishment as he watched Bakura sit with Tristan. Ryoko gladly explained to him what was going on, though she was not sure if he took her seriously or not. During the entire bus ride, most of the kids kept asking Yugi and the others if they were fans of "Yu-Gi-Oh!" They said that they were and spent most of the ride talking to the children about the show---all except for Kaiba. At one point during the ride, Steve turned a sharp corner. Plague, who had the small boy whom she had shoved out of the seat sitting next to her, smiled evilly.

"NASCAR!!!" She screamed, shoving the kid out of the seat again. Ryoko threw her geometry book at Plague and hit her in the head with it.

"Be nice!" Ryoko said scornfully.

"FUCK YOU!!!" Plague retorted. Kenyamon cheerfully picked up the geometry book from the floor and Hoofamon eyed it with contempt.

When they arrived at Patrick Henry High School, the group all filed out of the bus, stretching their cramped muscles and groaning.

"Man, how do you stand being crammed together like sardines?" Tristan asked as he popped his neck, causing Hoofamon to cringe.

"Well, when you've been riding that bus for most of your life, you get used to it," Ryoko said with a smile.

"What's with all of the guys dressed up like cowboys?" Duke asked as three boys in Wranglers, boots, and cowboy hats walked by.

"Rednecks. They're everywhere," Plague answered. Meanwhile, Kenyamon was happily chatting away with Téa.

"And one time when we were at Petsmart, Prue, Kitt, and Ryoko entertained themselves for half an hour watching hamsters running each other over with the exercise wheel! Oh, and they had these two chinchillas that were separated by glass and Kitt named the hyper one Goku and the antisocial one on the other side of the glass Vegeta. And Goku kept leaping at the glass and we were laughing about him probably saying, 'Hey, Vegeta!' Right before he'd smash his face into the glass!" Téa laughed as Kenyamon told her this, wondering what type of girls she was about to meet. If hamsters running on a hamster wheel could entertain them, then they must be interesting people! Ryoko turned to them as they approached the door that would lead them to the hallway outside of the cafeteria.

"Okay, behave yourselves and kiss your sanity goodbye," she said as she put her hand on the door handle. Yugi swallowed nervously as she opened the door and they filed inside of the building. Teenagers were talking in the hall and were either standing or sitting. Most of them stared at the new students. Several of the girls giggled when they spotted the boys while the guys gawked at Téa and the other girls. Approaching the cafeteria, Ryoko stopped. "We have to wait for the door," she said.

"Why?" Mokuba asked. His question was answered as a girl with shoulder length blonde hair, blue eyes, and brown black tipped fox ears and a tail similar to Ryoko's was repeatedly slamming the door onto the head of someone lying in the floor. She was wearing blue jeans, white and blue tennis shoes, and a yellow and black t-shirt.

"WHERE'S LUMPY?!" The girl demanded for the umpteenth time, slamming the door on the man's head.

"I don't know, woman! I don't have your Lumpy!" He cried.

"BULL SHIT!!!" The girl screamed as she slammed the door on his head again.

"Who the heck---" Bakura began.

"Hi, Prudence!" Ryoko greeted cheerfully. The girl looked up, a crazed look in her eye.

"Oh! Hi, Ryoko!" She said. Kenyamon walked over and looked at the man lying on the floor. He had spiky black hair and a large widow's peak and wore blue jeans, black boots, a black shirt, and a denim jacket.

"Beating up Vegeta, again?" She asked. Prue nodded.

"Yeah, because he stole my Lumpy!" She said, glaring down at the unconscious Saiyan prince. Malik spotted something brown and furry sticking out of Vegeta's coat pocket. Prue followed his gaze and bent down and pulled out a stuffed moose and stared at it.

"Lumpy..." She said wistfully. She shifted her gaze to Vegeta. "FUCKER!!!" She shouted, slamming the door on his head once more. Zoe looked over at a shocked Bakura.

"Kill Bill," she explained as Ryoko followed Prue into the cafeteria. Plague looked down at Vegeta.

"Vegeta 3:16 says, 'She whooped your ass!'" She shouted, kicking him in the head as she passed.

"I don't think he needs anymore brain damage," Duke noted.

"After living with Prue, I don't think he has a brain _LEFT_ to damage," Wolf sighed. The others filed into the cafeteria. Shinmon stopped dead in his tracks and Malik bumped into him.

"What's up?" He asked the cat boy.

"DUCK AND COVER!!!" Kenyamon shouted as she shoved Malik away from Shinmon.

"KIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTYYYYYYYYY!!!" Shouted a speeding blur followed by a cloud of dust.

"Oh dear---" Shinmon never got to finish as Kitt tackled him twenty feet away into the middle of the cafeteria floor. Several people merely glanced at them for a second before turning back to their breakfast. This was considered a normal morning.

"Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty," Kitt sang as she cuddled a stunned Shinmon.

"Don't kill him," said a tall man with messy black hair in an orange and blue gi as he plucked Kitt off of Shinmon with one hand. When the man set Kitt on her feet, she turned and glared at him.

"My kitty," she said defensively, grabbing Shinmon's tail and hugging it. Kitt was taller than both Prue and Ryoko and had curly brown hair tipped in pink that reached past her shoulders and blue eyes. She was wearing baggy black pants, white and blue tennis shoes, and a gray "Dragonball Z" t-shirt with a Super Saiyan Goku on the back.

"Morning, Goku," Ryoko said to the man as she headed for her usual seat at one of the tables after getting a chicken biscuit from the breakfast line. The others sat down near her while Mokuba left to stand in line behind a young brown haired girl. The Saiyan turned around.

"Hey, Ryo---What in the hell?!" Goku asked as he saw everyone.

"They kinda appeared unexpectedly and we're trying to help them find their way back to their world," Kenyamon stated as she sat down. Sin leaned against the wall and Plague stood nearby.

"Where the hell is Kat?!" She demanded. A girl with yellow eyes, long black hair, cat ears, and tail dressed in a red shirt and black pants looked at her.

"Where do you think?" The cat girl asked. A sudden explosion was heard from somewhere upstairs inside of the building.

"Does that answer your question?" Asked another black haired girl, who looked a lot like Goku. She, too, was dressed in a red shirt and wore baggy blue jeans.

"DAMMIT, I TOLD HER TO WAIT FOR ME TO GET HERE BEFORE SHE MIXED THAT NITRO IN THE CHEMISTRY LAB!!!" Plague swore loudly. Téa leaned towards Ryoko.

"Who're they?" She asked.

"The cat girl's Koneko and the other one's Tengu," Ryoko explained. "Watch out for Tigra, though. She was thirteen when she---"

"Especially you, ass muncher," Plague interrupted, glaring at Kaiba.

"Why should I be afraid of some stupid thirteen year-old?" He asked.

"Because she's a 300 year-old vampire who _LOOKS _thirteen and she's standing right behind you," Wolf said uneasily. Kaiba turned around and looked down at a pale girl with long black hair and black eyes. She was dressed in a red shirt, a black and red striped skirt, black thigh high stockings, and black shoes. She smiled deviously at Kaiba, just enough to show her fangs.

"Hi," she hissed. Kaiba took an involuntary step backward.

"Good morning, Tigra!" Ryoko greeted cheerfully. Tigra's cold gaze looked at her, then scanned the others.

"Good morning... My ass," Tigra scoffed. She calmly looked at Kaiba, who glared uneasily back at her. "I'm going to the hospital. I'll be back to make your lives a living hell." With that, the vampire left the cafeteria. All was silent until Yugi looked around at everyone.

"Hospital?" He asked.

"That's where she gets blood," Goku replied as he sat down with Kitt. Shinmon clambered into his seat at the end of the table away from Kitt as Ryoko quickly explained to her friends why the "Yu-Gi-Oh!" cast was at school. Suddenly, a small girl with long brown hair and purple eyes tugged on the back of Goku's shirt. She was wearing a purple baseball cap, black pants, brown shoes, and a white shirt with long purple sleeves.

"Daddy, daddy! Guess what?" She asked. Goku smiled down at the ten year-old.

"What, Risika?" He asked.

"I found a boy!" Risika announced, pointing to Mokuba as he stood next to her.

"WHAT?!" Goku cried. Mokuba stopped sipping his carton of orange juice and froze as Goku stared at him. Goku glared at Prue.

"I had nothing to do with this!" She said, holding up her hands defensively.

"Damn you, woman!" Prue looked up as Vegeta approached the table, clutching a large black bruise on his head.

"Rise and shine," Joey said to him as he sat down.

"DAMN ME, NOTHING!!! YOU STOLE MY LUMPY, BILL!!!" Prue roared. Vegeta shrank back.

"Veggie cowers before the wrath of Prudence," said a blonde girl with dark brown eyes. This was Mykinzie, and she was just as obsessed with random and shiny things as Kenyamon and Prue were. She was dressed in a black trench coat, a blue spaghetti strap tank top with a fishnet shirt over it, black flare pants, and blue shoes with red flames on the sides. She looked at Tristan. "Bill is Veggie's nickname, by the way," she said. A Japanese girl with long black hair and brown eyes dressed in a red and white traditional samurai outfit walked into the cafeteria, covered in blood.

"God, Nikkia! Who'd you kill this time?" Prue asked the assassin.

"Aerro?" Asked Sin.

"I wish," replied the blood bathed woman as she sat by herself at a nearby table. A tall girl with shoulder length pink hair and green eyes ran into the cafeteria, covered in black soot. She wore a purple tank top that showed her stomach, baggy blue pants with black stripes, black army boots, black half-fingered gloves, black and blue wristbands, and black thong straps were visible on her hips. On her left arm was a strange black tattoo.

"I didn't do it," the girl said as Kitt glared at her yami. Plague grabbed the girl by the shirt and shook her.

"KAT, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!! WHAT THE HELL DID I SAY ABOUT WAITING FOR ME BEFORE YOU BLEW UP THE CHEMISTRY LAB?!" Plague demanded. Kat punched the psycho fox girl and got away from her friend's iron grip.

"Who pissed in your apple juice? There's still plenty more chemicals left and enough rooms in this damn building to go around, plus the football stadium! Besides, I was testing something out," Kat replied.

"THEN WHERE THE HELL IS AERRO?!" Plague screamed. As if on cue, a girl leaped through a nearby window, shattering the glass everywhere as she screamed a Xena war cry. She landed on one of the tables and struck a pose with her sword. She was dressed in dark khaki pants, a camouflage t-shirt, and dark brown boots. Her long black hair was streaked with red and she had hazel eyes.

"Shit, my day's just been shot all to hell," Nikkia said as she cleaned blood off of her sword.

"What did I say about bringing that sword?" Prue asked her yami. Aerro flipped her off and Prue's jaw went slack. "Rude, mean, inconsiderate..."

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Everyone jumped as Aerro screamed when she spotted everyone.

"Must I explain _AGAIN_?" Ryoko sighed. Thankfully, Prue saved her the trouble and told Aerro what was going on. Kat, Nikkia, and Vegeta listened in.

"So, there's going to be even more idiots running around?" Vegeta asked.

"Yeah, so shut up and get used to it, Bill," Prue said as she smacked the bruise on his forehead. Vegeta snarled and clasped his head. Ryoko looked at the clock.

"Guess what time it is?" She asked. Kenyamon threw her hands up in the air.

"PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!!!" She squealed.

"No, it's time to go to my locker and get ready to start the day," Ryoko said.

"Like hell!" Aerro said. She, Kat, and Plague left the cafeteria.

"Everyone, tread with caution," said Kitt as she and the others got up. "When they're running loose in the school, who knows how many limbs you'll have left by the end of the day!"


End file.
